Why men have extramarital affairs?
Talk about a loaded topic that no one wants to chat about, this is it. Funny thing, married dating have been going on ever since ancient times. Extramarital affairs can be filled with problems, cause misery, and other troubles. In addition you should wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and sincerety thing, finances, age dissimilarity, spiritual background, guilt, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this article I will define an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other persons, discreet dating for married.
Why do women have affairs? There are as many reasons as there are seek affairs. I suppose mostly though it is just the human condition, the need for love, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a several explanations I have run across.
Physically we as human beings are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and fun, and sex makes us escape the real world for a brief period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Some people are able to switch the longing on and off, some are good at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another being, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the total romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos people has erected against extramarital affairs. For many individuals the yearnings will beat their doubts and make them risk the wrath of not only their family, but society also. So why, what is the mechanism?
Sex Addicts, possibly some of us are. Sex is extremely pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not injure your family or anybody else? You will need to minimize the hazard you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is beneficial to everybody, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the major cluster, gigantic actually. There are many couples whose marriage is over, apart from they feel comfortable in the way they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Also there are the children to consider. Your assets are so tangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay together besides love and sex.
Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that prevent them completing the sex act, at least not with their othere half. An extramarital affair from time to time solves the trouble while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Avoidance, sorrowfully this is a regular groung I fear. One or the other, usually the gentleman is sexually neglecting his woman for a tones of reasons. As a man I truly am thankful to you guys neglecting your wives and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “lonely wives” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but evil.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, maybe caring is not here, could be it is the closeness, could be neglect. Maybe we have simply grown separately, our ordinary interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is contradictory of what you want. Maybe I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they look for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run off, for economic gain, for retribution and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair